I lie down in the bed and remove my glasses, using only my imagination to masturbate to. Visions of Penelope storm my mind. Life could have been so different had we kissed in her car. Relaxation and surrender. No searching. Release. A sinking into the sheets.

I deserve this. Musette always gets more sleep than I do. I’m always up for hours after her.

I tell myself that I deserve this.

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